What is it about me that makes men insane? I am aware that I'm not incredibly unattractive...but I'm positive there isn't a woman alive that's looks make a man insane! I'm not amazing in bed and I'm not a horrid bitch (ok...well I guess that's debatable depending on the boyfriend but...). But somehow they mostly end up being criminally insane...or just fucking nuts.
Newest one to pop up? The Injun. (I do realize that I have skipped a whole hell of a lot but I'll back track...this just really needed to be noted cuz it's grating on my nerves!) Last year when Fingers and I broke up (Fingers = ex. That's all that's important about him to this tale) I began seeing this boy. Long hair, tattoos, HUGE arms and chest...ya know. He was overly sweet and overly attentive which Fingers was not. And I enjoyed this even though I'm not good with the clingy type. UNTIL...
He blew up on me because I wouldn't sleep with him...then again blew up on me when (months later) Fingers and I had gotten back together...and I don't handle fighting well. I'm a talker not a fighter!
We begin seeing each other again when Fingers rolls out again (So I like to stay in familiar territory...is that so wrong?) and he is amazing! Sweet, nice, supportive, looks amazing without a shirt...until we commit. And then he suddenly has demands and a really bad attitude.
After being chased down the highway at high speeds, forced to pull over and "talk" with him (which was really a talk with the cops that were called about the domestic dispute that had errupted in a parking lot full of people which is a great tale for another time), you would think that this signified a problem...ok. It did. And I got it. But he was also pretty fuckin scary. So I felt a little more comfortable keeping him calm and sane until I planned my attack.
His attack wasn't very well thought out...which meant that mine didn't have to be at all. It was a little more instinctive. See, one night he had called and asked about hanging out. I said nope...not on this night. He felt it was a good idea to get drunk at a mexican restaurant (which is understandable on Wed nights when it's half priced margaritas! Not on a Thurs...) then to call and pick a fight because I wouldn't let him spend the night (after informing me that I am his girlfriend whether I like it or not and he will be my boyfriend whether I want it to be that way or not). After hanging up (see previous statement about "...not a fighter") and throwing my jammas on, I recieve random drunken texts that make no sense and several phone calls...followed by a loud VROOM!
And all I can think is "I know this mother f*cker is NOT at my house!" Yeah...he was. And so being that I'm a SANE person with RATIONAL thoughts I assume that when I don't answer my phone or door, he will admit defeat, hang his head, and retreat back to his damn TeePee! NO! He will not! He will, however, jump the 6 foot privacy fence and stand by my bedroom window repeatedly calling me. He will also attempt to get in the french doors (dead bolted!) and then use his ID to get in through the garage door (after getting a drink from the water hose because breaking and entering works up a thirst)...enter my room with blood pouring down his leg and arm...and act like this is totally normal and natural. His response to "I called the cops" will be "If you had called them they'd be here by now" and then he'll sob incessantly while hugging my legs and saying "I love you! Why are you scared of me?" and then tell the cops he lives here and I'm "trippin".
I'm going to open a mental hospital...that way I know where my exes are and what they're doing. And when I'm sleeping...they will all wear straight jackets.
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